VISTAS: An awareness of a range of time, events, or subjects. A broad Mental View.
March 20

little girl with a desk and a quilt
Mouse drawn by B. J. Carper, using various tutorials from various websites.

"And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me. He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it."
- Matthew 10:38 -

"Far away in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see the beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead."
- Louisa May Alcott -


"It is easier to fight for one's principles than to live up to them."
- Alfred Adler -


"Everything comes to him who hustles while he waits."
- Thomas A. Edison -


sometimes I wonder what my purpose here is, why am I? It seems as though we all search in our lifetimes for that answer, and the sad truth that I have arrived at is that we are not to ever know, because are worth is not and will not be measured until our deaths.


I thought of a path in the woods, along the river bank, and a fall day, the beauty in the moment and the heartache it has brought. I thought of the warmth of the day and of the skin, the gaze upon my vision. I thought of you and knew that there will be days that you will remember too.


Wind blow away
take the cold and bring the warmth


If the truth doesn't save us, what does that say about us?
- Lois McMaster Bujold -


when walking a new path how does one know which way to turn, everything is approached with caution and a certain amount of fear. Fear of failure, and fear of repeating mistakes once before committed


Can one be alone surrounded by others?
Can one fight the bindings that confine oneself inside
Can one break free of the prison self-made


I continue to fight the war that rages inside of me When I begin to think I'm coming to grips with being a good person, I get slapped in the face by reality. Just when I feel like I'm winning I'm losing again, words from a song, and how true they are.

In the past month I had a few brief hours of total joy and contentment. a short passing of time. I felt happy the first time in a long time, and then he crushed that

In one moment I was laughing in the next crying In one moment I felt good about myself, the next worthless Why do I allow him to do this to me.

I really do want to be a good person I try so hard, but I feel like such a failure always letting someone down Never being what they want me to be am I not allowed to be what I want to be.


That action is best which procures the greatest happiness.
- Francis Hutcheson -