VISTAS: An awareness of a range of time, events, or subjects. A broad Mental View.
October 17

"Do not go where the path may lead, go instead where there is no path and leave a trail."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson -

"To play it safe is not to play."
- Robert Altman -


I found out today that I am going to be a Grandma, this is something I have longed for for so long, but I have to admit it has scared the beejeebers out of me. With the kids living here and me knowing she doesn't really have a mother figure to help her, I'm going to have to step up and help out. She has never held a baby and I have such a fear of babies I haven't held many, and it's been so long since Mat was a baby and even then I really didn't have much to do with his infant stage that I am totally ignorant on the whole baby thing, I've got to do a lot of reading and a lot of question asking so I can get this figured out before the little one gets here. We also got to do some house re-arranging as well, of course we got about 8 months to go so I think we can get it all done in time *LOL* I'm not going to sleep tonight, my nerves won't allow it I don't think.


"We do not inherit the Earth from our ancestors...we Borrow it from our children."
- Native American Proverb -


inside me is this little bit that longs for what we shared, for a peek at the truth that I once saw in those blue eyes. I often wonder what I did wrong to make things go the way they did, and is it my lot in life to walk the path alone forever and always.


time for more introspection.
i am me, plain and simple
who has no desire nor ever has looked for the easy path
for by not facing challenges
by not looking for the alternate route i would have missed so very much.


if I would have saved all my tears in a container, how big would it be? Would it fill a creek? an river? a lake? maybe an ocean if all my tears could be seen, then maybe someone would know the inner pain, the hidden part of myself I can't get beyond.


The length of a film should be directly related to the endurance of the human bladder.
- Alfred Hitchcock -


Be a good listener. Your ears will never get you in trouble.
- Frank Tyger -


The seeds of hope are planted
They have began their growth
the words still scare, frighten
remain unsaid
The silence is accepted
the honor thy code
the privilege of knowledge
without thee spoken word


Silence I crave silence
nothing blocks his his words
the pain rekindles
the cuts still bleed
Why won't he let me be


Since we cannot know all that there is to be known about anything, we ought to know a little about everything.
- Blaise Pascal -