VISTAS: An awareness of a range of time, events, or subjects. A broad Mental View.
October 19

"Doubt, of whatever kind, can be ended by action alone."
- Thomas Carlyle 1795-1881, Philosopher and Author -

"Life begets life. Energy creates energy. It is by spending oneself that one becomes rich."
- Sarah Bernhardt -


I was able to get off work about a half hour earlier than expected today which was nice, I had to take mom home which wasn't a plasant drive, she worries me so badly, things are escalating there again, and I truly fear that one of these days I'm going to get the call that one or the other has killed the other. The bruises I see on them, and the inner torment that each causes on the other makes me wonder why one or the other just don't walk away and give it up, abuse must be addictive or something, I just don't understand it at all. It's times like this that I am so thankful that I am alone in this world.


A thought to Ponder

I wonder why we can be as honest as the day we were born to everyone but ourselves, I wonder why we never speak what we truly feel, why we hide the emotions that are real and true, so that others don't know, so that others can't reach us, so others cannot hurt us. Who are we lying to? Ourselves or to all the others.


so deep in the night, with raindrops on the leaves and a brisk coolness in the air, I find myself unable to sleep, my thoughts are unknown even to me, I ponder what to write and find the words escape me, but yet I want to write, and I want to feel again, somewhere in the picture of life I have forgotten what feeling is like, I feel numb, as though I am really not living but am just here.


if one always hides, then one shall never know, if one never trusts, if one never loves, if one never gives, if one never shares, then one shall never find fulfillment, for in life every step is a new opportunity, some speak of regrets, some speak of pain, some speak of hurt and never daring to chance it once again, those are the ones who are dead.


when ones world is empty, when there are no hands to reach out and touch, to offer strength in the weak moments, no hand to to comfort, no ears to hear the cries and the torment, when tomorrow is the same as today, and the day before that and before that. where does it end and how much can one should take before they are lost and gone for ever.


the song has no words
the voice silenced
the beat a rhythm implied
the music quiet
the message clear


recalling the eyes
eyes of love
eyes of hate
eyes of longing
eyes of searching
eyes of sadness
eyes of joy
eyes of knowing
eyes of uncertainty
eyes of blue


I want to believe in dreams again
the magic of the moment
to know things are as they seam

I want to believe in love again
the happy ever after
to know that there is peace from above

I want to believe


What is the question I seek to answer is it who or whom I am? Is it what or which on my mind? I ponder the thought of wonderment and wonder at it's evasive power to allude my grasp.


Nearly all men can stand adversity, but if you want to test a man's character, give him power.
- Abraham Lincoln -